its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
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