wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
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