They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
Randomize
