My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
OPIZZABONMYDICK
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
Randomize
