my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Randomize
