Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
Randomize