So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize
