Slut skills are useful in every country.
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
It all started with a game of naked twister.
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Randomize
