But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
The Olympian is in my bed
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Randomize