when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
Randomize
