how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
Randomize
