Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
Randomize
