haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
Randomize