im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
You're perfect
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Randomize
