Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
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