party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
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