Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
Randomize
