Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
Randomize
