So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize
