i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
Randomize
