question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
Randomize
