He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
I need mimosas to revive my soul
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