just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
Randomize
