I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
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