so explain again why im purple
no
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
Randomize