im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
Randomize
