If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
Randomize
