Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize