And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Randomize
