So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
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