I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize