Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
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