awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize
