People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
Randomize