And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
Do you have any cake mix? I kind of need to make a "im sorry i drank all your parents tequila, threw up all over your floor and slept with you boyfriend" cake.
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
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