Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
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