This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
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