We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
Randomize
