Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
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