I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
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