Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
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