it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
Operation Purity has been aborted
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
