i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Hi, this is a test of the morning after apology broadcast system. If you're receiving this pre-recorded message there is a high probability I was a dickwad to you in the past 24 hours. You have my utmost and sincere apologies. Also if you have my wallet, house key, left converse, or lighter, give them/it back
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
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