I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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