You're completely useless in the revolution.
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
Randomize
