I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
Sorry, Geoff can’t come to his phone right now. He’s outside trying to show his dick to a bachelorette party bus with “DTF” written on the windows
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