guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
Randomize
