Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
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