apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
