and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
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